HelluvaGirl

This is not a diary any more

Tag: thoughts

My Letter to You, Five Years from Now

It is amazing how passionately we move towards some things that in the course of time appear to have been of a very different purpose than it seemed at the moment passing by. Some of them, though, leave you wondering about the possibilities that are given to you but not fully, as if we were […]

On Some Statistics

A year ago, an email came from someone I didn’t know. Though short and polite, it pushed me out of balance, as if a disturbance of a routine course. Like a computer game of cars being suddenly interrupted by My Little Pony cartoon due to some technical bug. 

Winter’s Tale

What if, once upon a time, there were no stars in the sky at all?What if the stars are not what we think?What if the light from afar doesn’t come from the rays of distant suns……but from our wings as we turn into angels?

On Avoiding the Choice and the Change

It’s like they say: life begins when you get fired, miss your bus or have insomnia.

Departure Bay

This one still gives the strongest emotional echo in my chest. Thoughts, memories, imagination… Sometimes I feel like I own experiences that are not mine. As if I have lived in the books I’ve read. As if I feel what I couldn’t possibly.

On the Other Side of Light

I found a bump in my breast. I always love to see her. There is a certain light around some people, like an almost visible cloud that makes you breath in deeper and smile as they approach. It’s an active energy, a positive determination that’s very catchy and uplifting. You meet them, and you instantly […]

On the Mismatch

I feel it now. I’ve been feeling it the past months; yet only now I know the words for it.

On People You Thought You Knew

Godparents are people you wish your child followed spiritually, intellectually and destiny-wise. Role models, care-givers and guides. I don’t know what my parents were thinking when choosing me the Godfather I had – or maybe there wasn’t much of a choice in the traumatised soviet generation in terms of spiritual guidance – spirits, though, being […]