HelluvaGirl

This is not a diary any more

Tag: disease

Solitary Confinement for Two

I am glad we have a long drive ahead. Going on a trip by car is one of the best things in the world: you live the anticipation of arriving but even more pleasurable is the feeling of in between. You are not where you were, but yet neither where you’re bound to. It’s like hanging […]

Breakfast

You have to try it with white bread. I can’t eat white bread. Just a bite. It’s more delicious this way. I can feel annoyance stirring up but obediently do what he says. Less fuss this way. As we eat, I notice his hands trembling. I look down at my plate. 

God’s Love

They say God’s Love is measured by the scope of challenges he gives us. If so, God must be growing real fond of me. He keeps inviting me to his playground where his lethal breath is right about to shatter my life as I know it.

The Land of Light

Whenever you are in pain or feel sad, remember it’s just your surface, Love. Instead of sinking in your sorrow, go looking for a place of light and happiness, where there’s no disease and anguish, where there’s only beauty and fulfilment, and Love. I rock her on my lap, pressing my cold cheek to her feverish […]

Imbalance

There are two types of stress I experience. The first is latent and ever-present, and it makes me eat too much. The other one overtakes my whole mind and the body is unable to consume a thing.

On the Other Side of Light

I found a bump in my breast. I always love to see her. There is a certain light around some people, like an almost visible cloud that makes you breath in deeper and smile as they approach. It’s an active energy, a positive determination that’s very catchy and uplifting. You meet them, and you instantly […]

Le conseguenze della guerra

You fight your war passionately, as if your life depended on it – doesn’t it always? You suffer casualties and carry on. You methodically pursue your  aim, thinking up new strategies and acting undercover. After years you realise there was never an enemy there, and no actual war per se, just you and your ever-intimate […]