HelluvaGirl

This is not a diary any more

Association Game

Imagine an animal.

It’s a doe.

What do you do when you see it?

I look her in the eye.

What does she do?

She stands there for a moment, then turns around and runs away.

Now imagine water.

It’s… no, not an ocean. It’s a lake. With a boat on it.

Ok, now think of a vessel.

It’s a large copper rummer.

What’s inside?

Wine.

What do you do with it?

I drink it up and throw it to the snow.

So your encounter with the animal is how you deal with your fears. The water is your sexual energy. It’s larger than a puddle but it’s still. And your rummer is the way you treat your relationships. They are firm and rich in content, but as thirstily you consume them, as resolutely you throw them away.

Read the rest of this entry

mode #whatever

what a relief to just stay in the place i was told was the worst
a dead-end they taught you had to escape
but see i want nothing from you
no playing house no longevity
what happened to having a good time and then saying thanks
no digit exchange no pushing to meet n’shit
we’re still convinced it is sort of the right thing
at least to /appear to/ want it
no
i’ve developed severe aversion to that wishful thinking
which cripples you once all projections and dreams get recycled
i’ve always wished i were simple
so here

Weak

Sunday anthem. My new favourite band.

And she’s amazingly beautiful to me.

Still Life

There are loves that leave you out of balance.

Loves that make you smile years after they pass.

The ones you chat about with old friends.

The others that are better forgotten.

And I think some people, once in their lifetime, find themselves in a firestorm of unearthly nature. Read the rest of this entry

Buddha at the Gas Pump. Jan Esmann

Jan Esmann interview

After watching a portion of this video I had a strange dream.

***

My whole life, experiencing the loss identity I’d feel like shit. I used to be so convinced I was supposed to be something. Clear-cut. Turns out I should’ve revelled in this state of in-between, in the grey nothingness I’ve known so well. Read the rest of this entry

Drunk in the Morning

Oooh we have a song for you! she shouts and turns up the volume.

There’s nothing like Mr. and Mrs. Nielsen both singing the refrain at my dining table! And though the man speaks little, he definitely can sing!

I LOVE friends.

Daily Sounds

Cheers to the New Year everyone! Cheers to keeping our eyes open to opportunities, listening to your heart, feeling the positive vibes and being inspired by amazing people.

Here’s one to watch this year, an adventurous soul with a musical taste that makes you think it’s a lucky thing you’re wearing headphones right now:

Daily Sounds

I’ve been meaning to share this particular playlist of Rytis for a while, occasionally posting gems from his channel on my blog – so many of Daily Sounds are actually my favourite songs!

Enjoy – there’s plenty to discover, savour and share.

Be the One

London

Catch & Release (Deepend Remix)